1.That akward moment when you say"just kidding",but you're dead serious
2.If robbers broke into my house and searched for money,I'd just laugh and search with them.
3.Dear parents,I am fully aware that money does not grow on trees,that's why I'm asking you for it.
4.Job interview:"Why do you want to work here?" Me:"I just want the money."
5.I wish my eyes could take pictures.
6.I don't just sing in the shower,I perform.
7.Teacher:"Why do I hear talking?" Student:"Because you have ears."
8."I need to talk to you." is the one sentence that reminds you of every bad thing you've done in you're life.
9.I think you're suffering from a lack of vitamin ME!
10.Why go to school when I can just light myself on fire and feel the same way?
11.That moment when I get comfy in bed and realize that I forgot to do something.
12.I wish blogging burned calories!
13.I turned my phone onto "airplane mode" and threw it in the air.Worst transformer ever.
14.Age 8:"Go to bed!" "NO!" Age 18:"Get up!" "NO!"
15.That depressing moment when you have no friends in your class and the teacher says"Find a partner!"
16.I need a 6 month vacation.Twice a year.
17.When I see it,I don't need it.When I need it,I can't find it!
18.People:"I like it when my boy/girlfriend tells me he/she loves me." Me:"I like when my microwave tells me my food is ready."
19.That akward moment when you look over at someone and they're already staring at you.
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